I thought... I would be happy
but this isn't happiness is it

underneath the joys of having exams done with
looms the dreaded feeling that my university life is also over

beneath the anticipation of returning back to my homeland, seeing my family and friends, eating great food
lies the gloom that my time with the friends, whom I have grown to love,
is also hastily running out

below the absolute bliss of having nothing to do and no care in the world lurks the
empty feeling of having nothing to do, no purpose in life and absolutely no vision for the future

yes, my time is running out and I still don't know what I want
I don't want this to end. And yet, I can't go on like this.
Why do I fight growing up? No one seems to be so hung up about it.

-S-I-G-H-!!!

Your cold and lifeless face,
lying down on a wooden bed,
segregated by a piece of glass,
it makes me feel bad.

I hope you got my little prayer.. RIP

Here's a passage about love.

"Love... Have you ever been in love?"
"You might say that."
"Horrible, isn't it?"
"In what way?"
"It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside of you and mess you up.
You build up all these defenses. You build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...
You give them a piece of you. They don't ask for it. They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore."

It's true, isn't it? =)

am feeling complicated..

i guess.. it shoud be.. well.. i got to admit..

am sad of leaving this house.. Flat 3B/4

bye!!

friendship

have you ever felt like sometimes things get too hard in friendship??
when your heart just feels tired and weary and you think you had enough..
well i am in that state, despite the position of my heart..
i find myself still concern about this friend..

dear this friend staying close with us right now..
you can take off your mask now..
you talk the talk, walk the walk..
and you just amazed me over and over again when you did things for your love one..

friends will come and go..
and you will go by the time we graduate..
and i wish you good..
sincerely from the bottom of my heart..

here i come

easter and intra-sem break is over..
time to buckle up and get ready for the 2nd half of the semester..
so much coming up from uni assessments and finals which will be in a month..
events coming up from birthdays, gatherings to farewells..
this semester has been really busy and fast..
time just flies when you have heaps to be done..
but it has been great!!

if you love crazy hectic lifestyle..
you try to fit everything into your tight schedule..
and by the end of the day..
when you finally get to sit down and reflect on the entire day..
you just feel satisfied and contented..
for being able to do so much within the 24 hours..
well that's me, i love to do that and at the end of it all..
after a long day, i still wanna be able to smile..
i know i am crazy but whatever..

take life to another level; challege yourself; you can do it!!

i live one life..
therefore, i will live life to the fullest and push my limits..
and be on my toes for whatever life has installed for me!!

well its good but sometimes it is good to take some time off to rest too..
just to unwind and refresh yourself..

as for now..
back to the stuff i have to do..
which is pack up my luggage and prepare to go HOME..

Presque la fin!

Bonjour tout le monde! Moi, je bosse dur en ce moment: les examens commencent biento(^)t. Mais, encore deux mois, et c'est FINI! J'ai des difficulte(/)s a(`) imaginer la vie apre(`)s l'universite(/), mais je suis vraiment impatient de faire autre chose.

Et toi, quelles nouvelles? Est-ce que tu en as aussi marre de la vie? A biento(^)t jusqu' a(`) notre prochaine rencontre!

_____________________________________________________________

Cher mes amis et ma soeur Fifi,
Bonne chance pour ton examen. Je suis su(^)r que tu vas faire des merveilles.
Grosses bisses! =) Haha..

Dear Mummy, Happy Mother's Day to you!!

I love you forever............... no doubt!!

Yee

i am sick.

first it was sorethroat.. then its flu.. and next its fever plus cough..

and so now i am having sorethroat plus flu and fever + cough with a sexier voice..

it started on tuesday night.. and i slept unconsciously for the past 2 days until thursday noon..

i ransacked my drawers to get a card called "NHS medical card", and i started to make a phone call to my university medical centre..

Receptionist: Hello..
LY: Hello.. I would like to consult a doctor, i am sick..
Receptionist: Alright, did u register with a local GP?
LY: Yes..
Receptionist: Can you give me your NHS number?
LY: Yes.. 704xxx4237..
Receptionist: Alright, Miss Lip Yee Kow..
LY: Yes..
Receptionist: Miss Lip, you have to make an appointment first.. How about Friday afternoon??
LY: I am so sick now.. Can i have it by today? As soon as possible..
Receptionist: Do you want to consult with a doctor or nurse??
LY: Doctor.. I am seriously ill..
Receptionist: Erm.. That could only possible by Friday afternoon..
LY: But i am so sick now..
Receptionist: I am sorry, so i book you in for Friday at 1pm, is that alright for you??
LY: Okay.. =(

And this early morning by 10am, i received a call from the university medical centre..

Receptionist: Hello morning, can i speak to Miss Lip??
LY: Morning.. Yes i am..
Receptionist: I am sorry Miss Lip, today is Good Friday, so we have to cancel your appointment as there is no doctor would come in today..
LY: Ha!!
Receptionist: I am sorry.. So your appoinment would be postponed till Monday morning by 10am.. Is that alright for you??
LY: Okay.. =(

.......................

i am sorry for the temporary blogging hiatus.. =(

been busy for the couple of weeks.. so time to cheer up the blog a little and to grumble a little and to waste time a little..

time had been passing by real soon nowadays.. time flies.. as usual.. am having another month holiday in March.. and assignment dues soon one by one in April.. and my finals is in May.. then i am done.. and i am going back to Malaysia.. things are just flying pass me so fast bafore i am able to catch or stop a thing.. that's making me real emo i guess..

i sit and think what i really want.. out of all sudden i am so lost about my life.. i had been studying for 20 years.. and why i need to study for so hard?? isn't it because to have a good future.. and why i'm still undecided when all the good luck befalls on me.. especially now is the time of economic downturn.. =( huh.. i dunno.. i am just a little lost with my future direction and my current position.. erm.. sounds sad eh!!

alright.. i think i should veer away from that topic.. let's talk about holidays.. i will be having 3 weeks break due to the easter day.. so we (sze wan, shereen, kai nee, vera, tat su, alex and i) will be going to travel.. from manchester, we are heading down to cardiff, bristol, bath, london and paris.. 9 days in total.. alex and i are the overall planner.. (praise us!!).. =) we both are really working hard on it to get the cheapest deal.. we study map and places.. not to forget to thank for the advance of google earth.. huh.. not easy.. and everything is 80% done now.. and i am looking forward of this trip.. and i do hope my broken french does help a little when we are in paris.. haha..

and since i came back from Malaysia.. everything goes well and 100% good with me.. i stay happily with my housemates with zero problem.. and my work is also going well.. and i fall in love with my current part time job - as a waiting on staff at the Old Trafford Stadium.. i enjoy meeting with my customers during the match days.. i am happy because they chat with me regardless of the times they need to repeat due to my poor of listening and catching their words.. they talk to me abt my study, my job, my country, their business, their interest, their family.. and their generosity of the tipping is now almost as much as my paid.. seriously being a foreigner in a new environment, without knowing much about their history, their cultural, their everything.. and also their heavy british accent their british slang and also their british jokes make me suffering much.. thus their willingness to chat with me make me a lil warm..

in the month of march.. we do have a lot of birthday celebrations.. huh.. seriously i am not a typical party kaki.. so not to say once a week.. and to hold a birthday party in uk also a kind of difficult matter due to limited space with a big group of people.. and is always become ours (alex, patrick and i) matter to think about the invitation, the menu, the grocery, the preparation of food stuff, games, emcee the celebration.. etc etc.. and the most hatred things is YOU messed up with my blanket and bed sheet with the muffin!! i have no offensive when i spell out this.. i let you guys have fun in my room but i do hope you take care of my room as well.. you can definitely mess up my room but not on my bed.. off course you can mess it and just leave it to me.. and the next day u meet me and say sorry to me.. and i reply and say "it's okay".. do you think i am really okay with that?? ...................................... ahem.. i think i shoudn't elaborate more..

to end this post, i wish sze wan, alex, my mummy and my daddy a very happy birthday in advance!! and i love you all very much.. haha.. xoxo!!

my coursework is killing me now.. is just like what terrence (lecturer) said "it's easy but not too easy".. i think i got his words now.. how am i gonna do that?? to make things worse, i can't seem to find enough relevant sources for that.. i hope someone pops up to help me with that assignment.. lol.. if only there was fairies helping me to clear off.. STOP DREAMING!! u're stuck with ur coursework, REMEMBER!!!!

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sometimes i do wonder.. if i am meant to be a surveyor..
as if i know what i am doing.. SIGH!!

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alright, time to attend the french class.. till then.. cheers!!

I AM SO HAPPY........ I GOT A WONDERFUL V'DAY!!

(to be continued)

unforgettable experience usually includes many many unexpected events.. so cny 2009 is definitely an unforgettable one.. not only because i was far far far away from, but because it snowed!! shd i conclude myself "lucky"?? haha.. whatever lo.. as to experience the coldest weather in the past 13 years in uk.. this is a white chinese new year!! god gave us a white celebration instead..



and here, we built the ever smallest snowman.. haha..



it's freezing outside!!

i still wish to say "Happy Chinese New Year and Gong Xi Fat Cai" to everyone.. yea, i know it sounds late as i am lazy to manage my blog.. =(

well for most of the people, chinese new year perhaps is another reason to party or celebrate, but technically everyday is another reason for celebration and jubilation: birthdays, festivals, anniversaries, etc.. as the Chinese culture so interwined in our lives makes it almost mandatory that we need to have a reunion dinner or travel home to our parents and also relatives.. however this year..

once in a while, i am always thinking an excuse so that i could skip any reunion dinners or visits to the relatives due to some reasons.. but this year when my mother told me "i could hardly get all my daughters together now".. i felt =( and so i think i will not avoid it anymore and do appreciate every gathering from now on..

and this year.. i had 2 days of CNY.. (as we need to prepare for our presentation).. 1st was the reunion dinner.. we had it in a famous chinese restaurant in Manchester with all the Taylor's mates.. celebrating CNY here is not too bad as I have a great company of friends to eat and play together.. anyhow, i had a little small harmless loneliness feel..

I thought the feel of CNY will only last for one night, but playing cards last night brought back more sense of the CNY presence.. and last but not least, the most entertaining show by Mr.Hong Tat Su.. that's the end of my CNY for 2009..

today is a totally new day without that feeling again.. everyone is in the nervous mood for the presentations.. and it is done by today.. and at the same time, it means the end of semester 1 in year 2..

**Add on: after reading the latest blog from Alex, i thnk i need to say one or two words as well.. thanks for all my group members especially the leader.. i dunno what to say.. but i do appreciate everyone putting in the efforts.. and again i think i need to apologise.. i am sorry for taking a wrong design solution.. i am sorry!!

phhhew.. time flies.. 2008 came and went by.. today marks the last day of the year 2008.. well it's approximately 8 hours to go.. this year is definitely a memorable one.. there was a couple of setbacks here and there.. but overall is great.. things were also different in this year, been working 9 months in DK-QS has given me insight into the life of the QS profession.. and then studying in Manchester has tought me plenty of stuffs.. gained lots of experiences with the new environment and all..

here's a flashback in 2008 with no particular order:

1. gained precious working experience in DK-QS as a assistant QS.. got to know a bunch of good bosses, colleagues (QS and Archi), and ppl from all walks of life..
2. been walking a lot, crying a lot, eating (chicken and pork especially) and gaining weight..
3. wandered and explored to farwaway places and off course with the help of good frens and passer-bys.. and i am sure more to come..
4. been talking a lot to my mom.. communication enhanced..
5. learnt a lot more from internet by random surfing and googling.. (apart from MSN, facebook-ing, etc)..
6. "explored" cooking skills.. =)
7. been doing a lot of house chores on my own..
8. hung out more with frens..
9. be more organized in whatever i did.. especially no more burning the midnight oils in order to complete the courseworks.. feel so pround!!
10. became less hasty and thus can avoid unwanted results..
11. oh yea.. i started to blog.. haha..

It's too much and i can not recall..

year 2008 is what i considered as fun and exciting.. I believe there's more to come in 2009, definitely..

And happy new year to you all!!

~hectic weeks ahead.. busy days are coming.. not to mention the stress and frustration come along with it.. it always comes in a package.. great right??

~anyway, i am good here.. still good.. but is freaking cold now in Manchester.. i have started to wear 4 or 5 layers.. so now you know why i need to buy more clothes.. haha!! but still feeling cold.. x'mas is coming!!

~people are wondering.. are you really helping them by giving them everything, or are you making them feel more and more entitled that they "deserve" it at all?? however mummy, i just want to say thank you to you.. and i am so "rich" because you love me!!

WARNING!!
boring and naive content below..
think twice before scrolling down!!

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i just couldn't find any time to blog recently..

or i should say.. life in uk here is so much happening..
and everyday does have "something" happened..
in addition to that.. courseworks are tailgating..
leaving no room for me to 'navigate' to
"daily rants" (am wondering to change the title.. sigh)..
anyway.. let's share the following..

5th Nov - been to the interview in MU.. first question, please talk about yourself.. oh gosh.. i failed it as i didn't really know about myself.. but luckily i still managed to do well in other parts.. yea.. tadaah.. got the job.. at the night, attended the Guy Fawkers Night (was a bonfire night at 'Hidden' Park).. got to know quite lots of ppl from.. Malaysia.. haha.. darn funny right.. well glad to know them.. on the way backed to the house.. the bus driver didn't stop us at the place we stayed but drove us to the market street.. we pressed the bell le.. gila betul.. we had to pay and walk.. ridiculous lol.. freaking cold that night.. and yea.. we had late dinner at 11pm.. so much of rice and dessert - vanilla ice cream with nutbella chocolate as topping and bran flakes.. (drooling now).. haha..

6th Nov - oh yea attended an induction class - waiting on (serving in silver box).. well.. talked about yourself again in the very beginning.. failed again.. =.= got to know a lady from china named Grace.. (she is helpful).. learned about the table manners, wines, and everything on serving.. found that this job is hard to handle.. hesitated again.. doubted on the ability again..

7th Nov - rushed back to house after class.. yea.. it's lee poh's birthday.. (happy belated birthday to you again).. we video-called thru msn.. chit-chatted.. and the very first time.. ALL the ladies from my unit came to unit 3A.. haha.. but pity Alex couldn't get a bus to library.. and bus driver insisted to check on our student ID before boarding on bus.. and i promised to serve them with the fried rice but failed again.. as the portion for 4 is not like last time anymore.. is bigger and bigger now.. oh gosh.. fattening..

8th Nov - what a dramatic on this day!! my housemate and tat su caused the fire alarm system broke down again.. one happened in afternoon and another one occured at night.. and now a club is formed.. i volunteered as president.. is about teaching ppl awareness on fire.. haha.. (jk..) and is the first day for Alex to work on MacD..

9th Nov - yaya.. yink teng's birthday.. tat su and i only found out that cakes sold in uk must be pre-ordered lol.. as there were no cake shops willing to sell cake for us!! so instead of cake.. we bought 2 dozen of doughnuts from Krispy Kreme!!.. haha.. and we got cake at last.. as his sister bought a cake with champagne online and delivered for him.. it's lovely.. and tat su treated him at Yates.. while i prepared mi suan soup + egg + fried chicken for him.. (reminds me that someone brought me to eat ramen instead of mi suan during my birthday this year.. but who cares.. oh yea.. thank him)..

10th Nov - extremely cold today.. loiterring from Mary Sea Cole to Chapman.. as we were not sure where's the tech 2 class conducted.. started to feel nervous again.. first coursework to be submitted on friday.. oh gosh.. palpitation struck me.. haih.. working hard on the coursework..

11th Nov - during the process management class.. Alex CWC laughed at my bad skills of taking pictures (he said it should be captured from top angle instead of bottom angle lo.. yea.. i got to admit that i didn't like to take pictures and camwhored la.. that's why i dunno).. and dumbness on using the "diamond" lol.. the 3 guys skipped class and went to work for MU.. first time ever.. they didn't cook dinner for me lo.. and i had dinner my own.. there were times i refused to eat with them lo.. but this is the first time they don't cook for me.. kla.. forget la.. haha..

12th Nov - yea.. the last 3 days before the submission.. stayed in my spacious room and did the last sketch-up.. let's the pictures do the talkings.. haha.. lazy to type liao..



13th Nov - early in the morning (uk time).. malaysia should be around 5 in the evening.. called to the sister and ranted again.. told her that i had palpitation again for few days.. chatted and chatted.. sorry yea jie jie.. i know you're having a hard time on your study also and the exam is ard the corner.. but still i can't help to call you so often lol.. as there's no one i can talk to.. i don't want to bother others so much.. and we both found out that sth interesting.. well my eldest sister is struggling on the body sistems, tendon, ligament and etc etc (proud of you!!) while i am on the structural designs of a building, joints and connections.. haha.. that's funny lo.. oh yea.. my laptop can not get connected on the wireless broadband only on this day.. haih.. and so i slept the whole day but still couldn't get my mind out of thinking of the coursework.. haih..

14th Nov - yea.. finally it's submitted.. but i am sorry to Alex.. early in the morning still do need you to help me in sketching the 3D-plan (due to a bit senget alr).. scanning and arranging well.. but.. but i prepared you a breakfast.. so it's deal.. haha.. and after the class.. they went to shop with me lo.. as i needed to buy a pair of shoes for working tomorrow.. and then we decided to have our dinner at TaiWu, which is a famous cantonese restaurant in Manchester.. and which Tat Su longing to go lo.. haha.. and we ate lobster, scallops, and etc.. 59GBP for 4.. haha.. delicious but i still missed the char kuay teow in seri kembangan lo.. huh.. and yea.. can not sleep well again.. as tomorrow need to work mah.. first time ever the "princess" needs to serve the princess.. tough-nya!!

15th Nov - yea.. terrible day has come.. brilliant Lip Yee forgets to put on the black trousers and goes to work lo.. and only realised when checked in at the Unit 30.. oh gosh!! how can it be happened on me?? oh my dear.. it did happen la.. and on you lo.. huh.. was disallowed to work lo.. was so depressed along the way out from Unit 30 to the north stand and to the bus stop.. still couldn't believe me myself had made this serious mistake.. no one could help.. either they were busy working or they didn't pick up my phones.. sigh.. huh.. i am ALONE.. oh can't stand anymore.. crying out loud and loud at the roadside.. summore with no tissue.. luckily got a gentlemen giving me tissue on time.. =) scared the sister and friend who were talking on phone to me.. oh thank you for the brunch you made.. as i am actually feel cold and starved..

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am sitting here and blogging after enuff of sleeping.. and i do realise on certain things.. i have been telling my family and friends "i will take care myself.. don't worry for me" or "yea, i am more independent now".. oh gosh.. all these are lies.. i actually don't.. and i am just depending on the 3 guys to take care of me lo.. and this time they are not with me.. no one reminds me.. that's why i made mistakes.. yea.. i do really rely on them so much lol.. and that's why i only know to cry and crave for help again when things happened.. and i cried because of jeans!! so malu ho kow lip yee..... and now only you know..
and as what a friend always concludes in the emails to me "look after yourself nicely lady".. yea.. i promise i will apply on myself this time, really!!

isn't i said my life here is so much "happening".. haha..
it's 5:30am in uk now.. that's all for now, some other time maybe.. take care and cheers!!

**to these people: my family, jie jie, E.A.P.. you now see me sharing so much on the blog and i supposed you to know that i am alright now.. i am sorry lo.. i know i was so ugly yesterday.. haha**

Happy birthday to babe kiyora!!

**i was forced to write this post.. if not her mummy doesn't want to answer my call.. sigh!!**

Cheers!!

Happy birthday to Wan Ming Hui.. the rockstar / the doctor / the bf..

Stay happily with her.. my dearest in the world..

This is a post specially dedicated to .............. mummy of babe kiyora!!

(Babe kiyora)

Well.. so how should i start..

Yo!! Happy Birthday to Kow Lip Ying..

She is my ex-room mate / trash talking mate / good companion / little sister..

Her zodiac is SCORPIO.. omg!! i find myself hard to communicate with 'SCORPIO'.. thank god she is definitely an exception.. she is so close to me.. and we always walk by holding hands together.. and yea.. i am missing her thick thick palm..

She eats a lot lolx.. that's why she aged 13.. (omg 13 only nia..).. looked 17 and her thinking is 21.. haha.. kidding with u la..

She is a penny-pincher lol.. she cried at least twice a day.. but that's before she aged 10.. people now is taekwondo with 2nd dan.. so doesn't cry easily.. XD!!

Football fan and also Liverpool die-hard fan.. oh, that remind me of Liverpool jersey + old trafford season tickets = present!! *blek*

Your exam is around the corner.. i wish you good luck la.. but i am wondering ppl always get No. 1 still deserve luck meh.. =)

Or i wish you stay healthy and pretty la..

ying ying, i love you lotsssssssssss.... muacksssssssssssss!!